This prompt is absolutely hilarious! I've seen a similar comic and loved it.
Harumi cursed as she held up a lock of her hair. She was absolutely doomed. Everyone knew that having outrageously colored hair was a bad sign. And she had the bad luck of having unadulterated sapphire curls. Thus far, in her 15 years, all it had ever done was cause problems. It made her the target of every trope known to man. After she had given birth, her mother took one look at her bright blue hair and had a nervous break down. At least it had only been a nervous break down rather than just packing up and leaving. It would have added to an already tragic backstory.
She avoided as many potential story plots as possible. As a young child, she had been been approached by a talking deer with "a magical quest." Later that day, she and her father had a nice venison stew. The locket with a mysterious stone her aunt had given her with a cryptic message when she was 12 was pawned to buy an iPod. Today in school, a new student arrived and immediately wanted to befriend her. She quickly put him in his place by having the biggest boy in school beat the ever living snot out of him. Though, Harumi had built a minor criminal enterprise in an effort to avoid being a main character. That in itself made her a protagonist.
When Harumi reached her house, she kicked off her shoes and stopped into her father's study.
"Whoa, what is the matter?" her father asked as she threw herself onto the couch in the room.
"This!" she yelled, holding up a blue curl. "This stupid hair."
"I'm sorry, sweetie," he said, putting down his pen and leaning on his desk. "I don't know what to tell you, Harumi. It is just the way the world works apparently."
"Way the world works," she mumbled, yanking a piece of hair.
"I didn't ask to some how end up as the main character in idiotic adventures," she said to her father.
"Trust me, we didn't ask for this either, Harumi."
Harumi when to whine again but was interrupted by a knock on the door. She got up and went to see who was at her door. As she opened it, a handsome redheaded boy was waiting on the step.
"Can I help you?" she asked.
"Fair maiden, my name is Prince Letrick and I come from a far away country," the boy said. "I have been overthrown and am in need of someone with a cunning and brutal mind. Rumor has it that you would be that mind. Will you aid me in my quest to reclaim my throne."
Harumi looked at the young prince.
"Ah, hell."
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